Bloggy Pop – A True Story

bloggy-pop
On my life – this really happened.  

Rachel, our host out here in Austin, runs an art gallery called Lombardi. On Thursday we went to the opening of a show she’d curated featuring an LA artist called Shepard Fairey.  There was a break dancing competition going on outside. We stood and watched it for a while but then I started to really need a piss.  There was only one small toilet (restroom) in the gallery so, as you can imagine, you had to wait in line.  I was stood there waiting with another guy who looked more like he needed to go than me so when it eventually became free I said

‘nah mate, on ye go, you go first’   

he thanked me and made for the door.  Just then another guy stepped in front of him and said, in an American accent

‘can I go ahead of you – I be real quick – I just need to rinse my big purple lollipop’

We let him go ahead. He literally had a big purple lollipop but I couldn’t help but think it was some kind of euphemism.  I turned to the fellow who I was waiting with and said 

‘I can’t help but think that’s some kind of euphemism – what do you reckon?’

He laughed out loud and we joked about it for a bit. The guy with the purple lollipop had been in there for about 20 seconds and had left the door ajar.  My toilet queue pal had decided to check to see if everything was OK.  He pushed the door open proper and went in to the restroom saying 

‘excuse me sir, are you okay’  

He then came running straight back out and said to me

‘OK, you’re not going to believe this! ………that big purple lollipop guy……….he’s just………disappeared!!!’ 

I replied

‘what are you talking about mate, the purple lollipop guy cannae of just disappeared -he only went in there a minute ago’

‘well come and look if you don’t believe me!’  he snapped back

So I did.  I went in to the toilet looking for the purple lollipop guy and sure enough, there was nobody there.  But how? Surely he just went out another door. I examined the restroom to find this other door that he had clearly left through.  There was no other door. The big purple lollipop guy had literally vanished in to thin air.  I turned to the toilet queue guy and said

‘did this all really happen?’

he assured me that it had all really happened.  A man with a big purple lollipop just jumped the toilet queue and then disappeared off the face of the earth,  right before my very eyes. I’d read about things like this but never believed it could happen to someone like me. Excitedly,  I went outside and told the lads all about it.  Tommy looked concerned and took my beer off me.  

‘it’s alright Ziggy, we’re going home soon.’ 

I couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened though – I started telling everyone about the purple lollipop guy  -nobody really believed me though.  

Last night I saw a guy called David Thomas Broughton perform in a hotel lounge. He was fucking amazing.  Johnny (from Fence) had told me he was good and I have a 10″ record of his that I really like so I thought I’d enjoy the show.  It blew me away though.  It was a frenetic performance using looping pedals and strange dances – full of charisma and nervous energy.  He was, at times, more like a performance artist or some kind of mime guy.   I looked around the room and saw that his performance was getting the same kind of reaction that me purple lollipop story was getting.  I met him afterwards but was too scared to tell him my story about the purple lollipop toilet guy in case he thought it was shit.

kevin-in-a-box

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